breaking free.

2009-07-28T23:29:00.001+08:00

MOVED.

http://msatika.livejournal.com

I think I should just stick to livejournal.com
apparently my blogger has been sulking for so long,
I'm giving up waiting.
Relink me on the new one people.
Love & Kisses. :)

KAE

2009-07-23T20:52:00.005+08:00

Selamat Malam Sayang...

Something's wrong w the page of my blogger.com.
Cant seem to find the icons.
It just looked very weird.
Kinda have to go all manual on blogging. Sheesh
Been busy w school though it's only the first week.
It's going great though I'm a little bit terrified of it.
Other than that, I cant wait for my Duo Flight w Daeia to develop.
3 Graduation Showcases coming up!
.
.
Kali terakhir ku mengucapkan,
Selamat Malam Sayang.

Atika

2009-07-20T22:46:00.002+08:00

After 2 Whole Weeks...

It felt a little bit weird actually.
A date after 2 weeks plus.
But nevertheless, I had a great time.
Thanks love. (:
Oh, Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince was somewhat disappointing though.
First day of school tomorrow.
I don't know how & what to feel,
but am looking forward to see the ones I've missed during the holidays!
I'm actually going to sleep as soon as it hits midnight.
Believe it or not.
.
.
.
It did left my mind for a long while.
But it didn't, in any way, left my heart.

Atika

2009-07-19T00:13:00.003+08:00

Half & Half = Whole

Had another day out. Half a day w Que & Syirin, another half is spent w the Saturday loves!
Thanks girls for the catching up session. Feels much better & is able to think and respond better, I think? Hahaha. Love you bothhhh! Meet up soon! (: Dinner w the Saturday loves was awesomeeee. The ones on my table were one hellavu bunch! I cant even finish my dish fast, causeeee the jokers, Jid, Faris & Khai made me, Ayu & Daeia laughed for a good 30 mins before continuing. Sheeeeshhhh. But it's all goooood. Alright, gotta go get my deserving rest.. afterrrr I'm done entertaining this blur kid. Laterr!

Atika

2009-07-17T12:49:00.002+08:00

The Dumbasses

Like finallyyyy, I get to meet this dumbass after her long trip in Indonesia!
Was good to see her again.
& I got to meet the other dumbass, Fortu, at work too.
How much I've missed them both!
& now, I cant wait for school year to start again sharing it w both dumbasses.
Love you babes! :)

Atika

2009-07-15T23:37:00.001+08:00

WHY

Why cant people just let me be & see me happy for even one day/night?
What did I do?
WHAT.

Atika

2009-07-15T00:21:00.002+08:00

Got A Big Ego

Tonight, something really triggered it all.

I can be egoistic about it. Cause I can be fucking good at that.
I can be snobbish about it. Cause I'm kinda like a fucking big deal.
I can be heartless about it. Cause I can be a better bitch.
I can be ignorant about it. Cause I don't give a flying fuck no more.

But if I were all those, then the world that evolves around me will be left in distressed.
.
.
Oh what the hell! Fuck you. You still need me.

Atika

2009-07-14T02:05:00.002+08:00

For A Dear Friend...

♥ A says:
*thing is, i can totally understand how she feels
*why do you think i pushed N away so far for so long,
no matter how big his effort is to win me over?
*babe, what you should be after is not only her heart, but also her happiness.
*if you cant have her heart, the least you know she is happy somewhere.
& that's the most rewarding sacrifice you can ever give someone.

& I know what it meant when Sara said it hurts like a bitch.

Atika

2009-07-13T15:59:00.005+08:00

Thank you

The sister who knows every single detail of what's been going on.
Knowing almost every secret there is in my life.
I love you very much baby.

You can never ask for better best friends than these two.
Always keep me away from being hurt.
I love you both! (:

Thank you very much.
I miss you girls.
Now you know the reasons why,
it has always been you both.
Anytime soon now.
Loves (:

& the one I can never thank enough.
Who supported me throughout
Even though I know it's wrong of me to harbour such feelings & thoughts.
You never gave up on me.
Thank you love (:

& Sexayes, thanks for the company, smile & laughter recently.
My sudden comeback will take some time.
& I hope it'll be all good soon.
I'm loving the bike rides especially w Hafis Awal!
He's a bundle of laughter, smiles & jokes.
We'll meet soon for our plan okay! :D

My Saturday gang, I miss you all very, very much.
I promise to meet all of you soon.
I havent forget you all okay! :D

Alhamdulillah. (:

Atika

2009-07-11T14:23:00.006+08:00

Time-Out

...

Atika

2009-07-10T14:56:00.003+08:00

Stubborn

I never meant to let it get so personal
I can't let you know
And I won't let it show
But no matter what you'll never see me cry
.
.
.

On a lighter note,
10 more days to school!
I dont know what or how to feel about it.
But I definitely cant wait to leave my current schedule at home.
It's time I get out for some fresh preppy air.
It's time I get my game face on.
Woohooo!
Daeia & Fortu, you guys owe me juicy details about Indonesia.
Cant wait for the meet-up babys!
:D

Atika

2009-07-08T23:33:00.004+08:00

Listen..

Fuck you, you, you & you.
All screwed up like fuck.
Hurt, disappointment, secrets, judgements.
Fuck all those.
You people need to get a fucking reality check.
Stop being a fucking hypocrite & a coward.
I know what you know.
& you jolly well know, things will go upside down if you fucked me up.
You dont know how painful it is for me.
One wrong move.
I just need one wrong move
No acknowledgment & that's it.
.
.
.
On a brighter side,
Thanks babe for the small pep talk.
It's screwed up yeah.
I know I can count on you.
Love you. (:

Atika

2009-07-08T13:04:00.004+08:00

Just Dont Fall

Seriously, whatever that rocks your boat.
.
.

& I just did the most stupidest thing ever.
Why didn't I just think before I say?
Fuck.
.
.

Thanks Achid for the laughter & smiles!
I still owe you one okay!
& you still have to help me w the bike okay!
:D

Atika

2009-07-07T18:53:00.003+08:00

What...

What hurts the most

Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin' to do

Atika

2009-07-06T01:35:00.002+08:00

I Miss You

Sorry I never told you
All I wanted to say
And now it's too late to hold you
'Cause you've flown away
So far away

Never had I imagined
Living without your smile
Feeling and knowing you hear me
It keeps me alive

I never showed you
Assumed you'd always be there
I took your presence for granted
But I always cared
And I miss the love we shared

Although the sun will never shine the same
I'll always look to a brighter day
God, I know when I lay me down to sleep
You will always listen as I pray

And I know you're shining down on me from heaven
Like so many friends we've lost along the way
And I know eventually we'll be together
One sweet day
Eventually I'll see you in heaven

I miss you, always have & always will.

.
.
.

I love my Sexayes boys.
They really know how to take care of each & every single one of us girls.
& the Sexayes girls have been awesome.
Each & every single one of them.
Love yall.

Atika

2009-07-05T01:14:00.004+08:00

040709

Heairil Zurhelmy
09 March 90 - 04 July 09

It takes time to heal. InsyaAllah all will be fine.
I'm sorry. That's all I can say.
Al-fatihah.

Atika

2009-07-02T22:34:00.003+08:00

It Was Never...

... about Me.

... through Me.
... around Me.
... siding Me.
... for Me.

...
It was never Me.

For whatever was said & done,
& I know I shouldnt be doing this.
I still have hopes & faith for what it can give me in the future.
InsyaAllah.

On a lighter note,
BFF! I MISS YOU! :D

Atika

2009-07-01T00:12:00.005+08:00

To one of my beloved & favourite babyboy,

HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY MUHAMMAD HELMI SUBAWI!
I've said whatever I need to in the text.
I love you! (:

& sometimes, you really make me wonder.
are those little actions supposed to hurt me?
if they are, then you're succeeding & is doing a very good job of it.
kudos to you.

Atika

2009-06-29T23:14:00.003+08:00

Will You Be There?

In Our Darkest Hour
In My Deepest Despair
Will You Still Care?
Will You Be There?
In My Trials
And My Tribulations
Through Our Doubts
And Frustrations
In My Violence
In My Turbulence
Through My Fear
And My Confessions
In My Anguish And My Pain
Through My Joy And My Sorrow
In The Promise Of Another Tomorrow
I'll Never Let You Part
For You're Always In My Heart.

Michael Jackson
1958-2009
We all miss you dearly.

Atika

2009-06-28T00:35:00.007+08:00

2 Surprises In 1 (II)

I promised yall the snapshots, & here they are! Awesomeeeee! Enjoyzing! :D

The 2 cakes I baked w Mama's help

Nothing beats having bestfriends like them!

Hel, Hel's picked gf, Thurr2, Tiq, N♥ & Me!

Sexaye partner manipulator bbyg, Tiq! We is tha dopest! Hahaha

The to-be-20 boy on 1st July

My favourite boys!

The chocolate pancakes that Tiq baked for Hel.

Some of my favourite beloved people(:

N♥

That's it folks! Before this, I went over to meet up w Saturday love gang for a while. Proceeded to take a look at Orrang & I got hungry halfway, so I dragged N♥ over for dinner while the rest stayed behind. & I got sooooooooooooo cranky cause I didnt get what I was craving for & I almost went home w/o dinner. I wanted to withdraw cash but the 2 nearest atm around couldnt dispense cash. Grr. So in the end, we walked over to PS in silence as my cranky-ness was really getting the worst out of me. Of course, N♥ was my victim yet again to tolerate everything. We both hate it when that mood comes over me. I wasnt mad or anything. Just cranky as I was already really hungry. But as soon as I had my dinner, my mood lightens up & today ended w leaving a huge smile plastered on my face cause N♥ made it possible. Heh heh. Right now, I'm getting a little sleepy & it's a bummer he's already off for work. I should probably head to bed soon. Goodnight loves!

Atika

2009-06-26T23:41:00.004+08:00

2 Surprises in 1

Cant deny it, but am somewhat still puzzled w the decisions made or whatever. It really make me wonder what the heck are you thinking at times. Seriously, no one make me wonder more than you do. You need to pay a little more attention to the real needs & the real wants. Cause right now, you cant just make a decision based only on your own satisfaction. Unless, you want to just stick to being plain selfish, I tell you, you won't make it.

On a lighter note, today was a success! My partner manipulator bbyg, Tiq, & I created a surprise for my two favourite boys. I am proud to say that it went well & was totally unexpected for them esp Hel! All along, he thought it was my surprise for N♥ for our 1st year, but it turned out to be a surprise for him too when we came out w the birthday cake for him as an advanced treat. I totally left out the part of me baking 2 cakes instead of just 1 so he wont know anything! Hehe. He was wondering where the heck did the other cake came from when I was already w him all the time when we met. Magic! Heh heh heh. So, N♥ thought it was for Hel while Hel thought it was for N♥. Hahaha. Today was definitely enjoyable w the bestfriends & the boy. The surprise was a success, the picnic was awesome, the weather was great & the company was greater! Shall upload the snapshots soon. They turned out awesome too! It was a good day I tell you, a good day! I'm hoping for more dates w these bbys! Soooooon please! :D

Atika

2009-06-23T23:59:00.004+08:00

ONE (II)

Today, I spent the whole day w N♥. Though the day didnt turn out as expected & it started out badly, I think that movie saved the day & ended it on a good note. So I had my B&J indulgence today after such a loooooooooooong time of waiting & procrastinating to get it down my throat & into my tummy. After a walk around through, in which I still havent gotten what I was looking for & I got frustrated & upset over some issues, we headed down to catch the movie that I've been anticipating. Transformers 2 was the shit!! & damnnnnnnnn, Shia Labeouf, the former Disney Channel kid is all grown & sexaye! He was interesting to watch! & my favourite classic Transformer, Bumblebee was even more adorable this time! :D Overall, it's worth the free tickets & I would love to watch it again. The effects, the computerized details, the acting, almost everything is there to create one helluva action-packed punch movie! 2 1/2 hours stayed rooted in my seat and not letting a single action leave my eyes. I'm not good at rating movies but you can tell by this post I am very satisfied w the result of the whole project. & right now, since we skipped dinner altogether, I am very hungry & cant wait to attack the crackers on my study table after this post. I am Optimus Prime. Autobots, Roll Out!

Happy 1st Year (:

Atika

2009-06-23T23:50:00.000+08:00

♥Sexayes♥

A mini celebration for the birthday boy, MOK JUFFRI!
(22nd June)
Happy 19th & have a blissful last teen year ahead!
Enjoyzing!
& on the 20th June, we had our annual June holiday gathering at the beach!

The reason why I love spending my time w them.
These are whom I've grown up w be it since pri or sec school days.
They are always there for me.
I love you guys v much, every single one of you.
I cant wait for raya this year!
W almost everybody having their license, it's going to be v different.
I will have to wait a year more for mine cause I have no time at all after this holidays.
Bleahhhhs.
But to those who are having their practicals,
I wish you all the best! (:

Atika

2009-06-21T21:01:00.008+08:00

This Sunday Is Different Somehow

I want a pair of these please please please?
Right now, my tummy is bloated w the bone steak Mama cooked,
& the loads of durians she bought & we finished off everything.
It's been a long time since I ate so much & my tummy is making me feel really queasy.
Boohoo!
.
.
.

You made me feel quite good about myself today.
I said things I didnt thought I would actually say it out loud.
You made me sound like an angel.
I just want the best for you.
& you know I'll always be here no matter who I am in the future.
You are who I want to grow out of my teen years & step into adulthood with.
You are the friendship that I will never let go of.
You are the tears that expresses my sadness,
& yet, you are the smile & laughter that erases my unhappiness.
You are why I fall flat on my face at times & was forced to pick myself up.
You are why I'm changing be it good or bad.
You are worth every silly thing that I've done for.
& why am I foolish enough to be by your side after all those negativity?
Cause I've loved you as a person since the start & always will.
Cause you are that one soul whom I can be assured the long-lasting friendship with.
Cause your friendship with me, means the world to me.
♥ ♥ ♥

Atika

2009-06-17T21:01:00.004+08:00

PHU-TURE

I'm 19 this year & I still have the heart, mind, wants & needs of a young girl. Sometimes, I wish I dont have to grow up, or rather, growing up would be easier than it seems. As for now, I'll never stop worrying about my future. I know what I want & what I'm aiming for. I'm going to work hard for it. I just hope doors of opportunities are everywhere and that falling flat on my face while heading upwards wont be such a big risk that could stop myself from reaching out to what I'm made to do. & w all the love around, I need supports from my loved ones & from those who believe I can do it. As for now, I'm going to rock my last teen year and to also prepare myself to face the challenges of being in Year 3 in July. I know I have sacrifices & hard decisions to make. & when I do, I hope each party understands my reasons in doing so & hope it wont damage whatever's been built. InsyaAllah, everything will work out fine. (:

Atika

2009-06-14T01:05:00.002+08:00

Cus You Spoilt Me Rotten!

Alongside the red jacket I got last month, today came the next gift, the Fourskin Medic Bag that I've been eyeing for a long time & that's to be added to my already growing bag collection. Why am I this lucky? Because my special boy really knows how to spoil me rotten w the gifts & putting a smile back on my face seeing how upset I was. Now, I've really realised how pampered I am w him & how he always goes along w spoiling me even more, & I'm not only talking about the gifts! After a run through in town w the boy, we went our separate ways in which he headed to work & I headed to Vivocity to meet up w my Saturday loves. So my whole day was filled w one of the best companions on Earth & tomorrow will be another short day w them & ending my day w the boy.

On another thought, I really need to shop for more tops cause my latest craze are those rock-chick, oversized tees which I could pair them up w a nice pair of jeans, adding accesories to the whole look. I've also been eyeing some a little bit more girlish tops which go great w a pair of shorts. Okay, I am so going to get them soonestttttttt! Right now, I gotta go get some shut-eye cause my left eye is geting watery cause of my contact lens which I've used for about 5-6 months? I know, I know, I better get a new pair tomorrow before the boy starts nagging at me to change them. :P I'm off to bed now, sweetest dreams to me!

Atika

2009-06-12T01:24:00.003+08:00

Most Special Boy Goes To...

You know that you've secured that special space in my heart
no matter how things work out or ended between us.
I'll never forget you no matter what.
Thank you for everything. (:

Atika

2009-06-09T22:07:00.003+08:00

09.06.09

I have so many questions in my head. I hate doubting someone cause that shows how insecured I am about him/her. I should do myself a favour & go on living life like a true teen. Afterall, it is my last year & hell yeah I'm gonna rock it! I have some plans up my sleeves already. It depends whether I've included you in or not. & by you, yes I do mean you. So, now, I'm gonna start doing that w that big tub of PADDLEPOP ice cream I've gotten for myself. Enjoyzingggg! Toodles! (:

KAE

2009-06-07T17:00:00.011+08:00

Enjoyzing Shots!

The photos are finally up! That was a fast job Fiqah did. Thanks for all the awesome shots darling! You could actually start a business snapping all these shots. :D Here are the shots! Enjoyzingggggs!

First up: Street Festival 2009 @ Vivocity, 05.06.09

Will's Invasion

Ayu Syg

& the next day, was Rhythm & Poetry @ Arts House : PlayDen, 06.06.09.
There were a loooooot of shots taken. They are all up at FB. Woohooo!

WFM

Nizmatic Jin

Sexaye Mami!

We were all in Red

The darlings

Nizam <3

The Greatest!

Till then!

KAE

2009-06-07T00:12:00.003+08:00

Sg Hiphop Saturday

Happy 17th Birthday to my dear Mimi.
May Allah bless your beautiful soul in any way possible.
InsyaAllah, everything is going to be fine.
I'm here for you precious.
Love. (:

Rhythm & Poetry was dope, happening, the shit, whatever you wanna call it. It's nice to see the old schools mixing w the new cats and bring to life one hella gig. I had my share of fun what w the greatest cliques, the loveliest girlfriends & also the awesome-st boyfriend & his parents. It's nice to see people singing along to Sexaye Mami! (: Today was so eventful & I'm liking my Saturdays w a successful gig like this. Power power power! I will upload pictures up once I've gotten them. Now, I'm off for my well-deserved beauty sleep cause I cant hog on the phone tonight as he is working. Sidetrack, shoutout to the precious little sister, Syarinah! Love you precious! ((: Okay, it's time for me, well-known as Miss Butterfly to sign off! Goodnight people!

Now, even playas get played.

KAE

2009-06-02T22:43:00.005+08:00

Aint No Chick Got ILL Like Me

My cheeks are getting bigger eh. Bleahs.

Anyway, Windows Live Messenger 8.5 was being such a pain in the ass. I couldnt sign in and at last I had to uninstall it and reinstall the older version of 8.1. It gets a little bit of getting used to. But oh wells, it had to do for now cause I tried reinstalling the 8.5 again and I still couldnt sign in. Anyone with any solutions to this please please please help me? :( So, tomorrow afternoon, two of my precious ones are flying off as mentioned in the previous post. I hope they have a safe flight over and back and of course, to have Daeia coming back w all my wanted needs & wants from Indonesia. It's a sad thing I'm not able to join them w a whole month of fun & partying over there, but then again, we've talked about Thailand/Bangkok at the end of Year 3 so I'll be anticipating that! I have plans and dates already set up this weekend and I have to accompany Mama for her hospital appt for 2 days and a day w Sexayes watching Gentarasa next week. I've yet to set a date for the Sexayes girls & for Tiq & Hel bbys. Anyone else up on the list of dates/plans w me? I wanna try fulfill them all this holiday.

Tomorrow wont be just another day of sleeping, eating & watching tv the whole day. I've gots to at least do some house chores & I plan to re-organise my wardrobe that is about to burst. In which that reminds me, I'm gonna go shopping soon. If my allowance allows me. But then again, I'm saving up for something else even more important & I need the help of my next month's allowance for that. Hopefully it will all turn out good! Alright, I'm off now to start calculating my allowance and dividing them up wisely. Toodles! (:

KAE

2009-05-31T21:49:00.003+08:00

Precious Ones

Gonna miss these precious ones while they are away for a while. Go & come back here safely okay. Loves. (:

& To my other precious one, Hasmidah,
Happy 19th Birthday Love.
(1st June 2009)
May Allah bless you and stay positive in life.
I miss you & let's meet up soon! (:

KAE

2009-05-27T23:40:00.002+08:00

PRO DZ2 EI

My PRO DZ2 EI.
They made my day & ended my night w full of smiles & laughters.
Cause Daeia is being her full of nonsense self.
Cause Hel was always there to put a smile on my face.
Cause Nizam has me close all the way.
I love you three! (:
Woohooo! PRO DZ2 EI!

KAE

2009-05-26T22:07:00.005+08:00

Lala Land

The question that I've been asking since the start.
Who am I again?
.
.
.
.
Meet my new addiction:

I love his crooning voice & his humble self!
He's good-looking & also a family man.
Plus plus plus & bonus points to a good man.
Yummy yummy!
& now, I am seriously bored out of my wits.
Now, let's see, who will be those kind souls to entertain me later on...

KAE

2009-05-25T23:07:00.006+08:00

Another Monday

To my babygirl Rahayu Ridwan, Happy 19th Birthday!
Get well soon & I'll keep praying for your health.
May Allah bless your beautiful soul in every way possible.
I love you! (:

On the other note:

I feel troubled and insecured lately.
I feel like closing down my blog.
To keep myself from posting unnecessary stuffs up anymore.
Stories, personal stuffs, pictures.
This is the time when I choose to keep it when I should talk & let it out.
A few more rounds of negative nights alone.
Hold on tight girl cause here we go again...

Am no one to be proud of.

KAE

2009-05-23T00:16:00.003+08:00

Eleventh.

Another 23 has arrived. Love. (:

KAE

2009-05-22T22:05:00.002+08:00

Time Bomb

I'm upset w my dad. A living time bomb at home right now. Basically, he's sulking. He wouldn't talk much anymore to anyone of us. I know he's shouldering quite a burden lately. I will do anything to help. Even get a job. But I cant just work for 2 months cause I am not going to during my Year 3. I wont have the time, I can guarentee that. I just hope he will resume back to his normal self. & now, I'm learning to cut down on electricity & use my allowance wisely. I won't be online till the wee hours of the morning when I have a phone date. But, Nizam's working night shift again tonight. What to dooooooo~

Another day out tomorrow! Meeting w the Saturday loves! (:

KAE

2009-05-21T16:04:00.001+08:00

Dear Life

Warm was the sun,
That covered my body, soul,
Reminded me of you as I first known,
Those were the days,
The days that changed my life and made me new,
I became somebody through loving you,

Sometimes in life,
You run across a love unknown,
Without a reason, it feels like you belong,
Hold on dear life,
Don’t go off running from what’s new,
I became somebody through loving you

KAE

2009-05-20T23:09:00.003+08:00

cause 23 could work.
cause 23 could mean so much more.
cause 23 is what it is.
(:

KAE

2009-05-18T23:50:00.004+08:00

What Hurts The Most

What hurts the most was us being so close yet I cant seem to tell you everything or anything when I'm upset and heartbroken w the things you do. It used to be different and now, I'm even afraid of you. Afraid of you even more. Emotionally and mentally. You were no longer that friend I looked up to always, I seek to pour out all my problems to and I searched for every night. Yes, I laughed, I joked, I smiled every time but you dont know how much I've been hurting inside and how broken my heart got when you made a decision without considering my feelings. I've never been this sad in any friendship before to be honest. Maybe, I expected too much cause you showed me the hope and faith to it. In the public's eyes, I'm always the one flaring up and getting all worked up for nothing. Cause I hate showing my sadness, I turned to anger. It's so hard for me to speak up anymore cause I always get shot down for my childishness and silliness. Fights are just excuses for me to start making our friendship go into another direction. It's because I treasure our friendship, I wanted to let it go.

You should know why I look forward to our meet-ups half-heartedly. You should know why I didnt want to waste my time just so I could spend 2 hours drinking chocolate shakes w you. You should know why I prefer going out w the rest. You should know why. You've been reading me in a wrong way right from the start. Call me whatever you want and say whatever you want about me. You never know what's been going on anymore.

KAE

2009-05-17T21:00:00.003+08:00

Fast Food Served Fresh

Dinner-ed at Arnold's. It was my first time over and it's w my family. The fried chicken there rockkkkk! Y'know, I envy girls who rides a motorbike. Especially a BLACK motorbike. Damn. I seriously need one. Yes, it's a NEED not a WANT. Need my license first though. Hmms, Daeia's coming over tomorrow and she will finally see my messy, messy room. We're gonna get down and dirty, baking! Woohooooo! This is one of those very random post that I need to get my blog going.

& now, I'm waiting for my phone to ring. Waiting patiently.

KAE

2009-05-16T00:34:00.002+08:00

Please Wait

Dont say you will when you never did. I've been waiting.
Longer than I can imagine.
Longer than I would usually wait that it surprises me sometimes.
& now, more waiting?
Nope. Lesson learned.
Why bother anymore?

KAE

2009-05-15T06:48:00.003+08:00

Dawn Wreck

I'm 19 & I'm worried about my future. That is partially the reason why I'm up at this time of the day. I'm really worried. What are the alternatives in case things that I've dreamed about and have goals for do not turn out as planned? I know I need to find those opportunities instead of just waiting for them. & no matter how times I've failed, I cant give up. I know, I know. So spare me the lecture already. It's not that I'm not trying. It's just that I really dont know where to start and who to start with. Shucks. I've just stepped into my holidays (read: Day 3) & I still have Year 3 to focus on, so what the hell am I doing up right now thinking of my future? Precisely. You tell me.

Dear God, only you know how much I want it and for what reasons. Answer my prayers soon. Amin.

KAE

2009-05-15T00:37:00.003+08:00

3 Was Never A Crowd

Had a fun day out w Daeia & Fortu. It kept my mind off a lot of things that has been running through my head. We spent some time song writing and we came up w 3 new songs. It's not complete but it was a good start cause it gave us very good feelings after that. I love my girls. (: Right now, I'm trying my best not to fall into my old habits of feelings every night. So what do I do next? Yes, I'm heading to bed. Goodnight loves & wish me the sweetest dreams yet. (:

P.s: Happy 19th Birthday Achid! God bless your beautiful soul. Amin. (:

I hate you no matter how much little relations there are. But I wish you well. True that.

KAE

2009-05-13T00:29:00.006+08:00

Magic Without You

Boy, I aint your canny ragdoll
Pick myself up when I fall
Be tripping if you think I treat you like a fool
Still fly without your love
Cause baby I've had enough
See me shine like a star
I'm magic without you.

No worries, all's fine w love right now.
I just find these lyrics really interesting.
I just need Barbie to spice up the other parts. :P

Ooh ooh! I got an unexpected gift today! Yes, it was hours ago but I'm still very excited about it cause I'm loving it so much! :D It was such an impromptu & thoughtful thing. Such a sweetheart! (: Oh! & Wooohooooo, HOLIDAYS ARE HERE BABY! :D

P.s: HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY SYAFIQ! God bless you love. Sexayes love you. I love you! WooooHoooo! Rock on and keep chasing your dreams. :D

KAE

2009-05-11T14:08:00.003+08:00

Treats & Tricks

If you need a place where you can run
If you need a shoulder to cry on
I'll always be your friend

When you need some shelter from the rain
When you need a healer for your pain
I will be there time and time again
When you need someone to love you
Here I am

I AM CURRENTLY CRAVING FOR NURHIDAYAH ABDUL RAHIM'S FISH & CHIPS.
YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO D WINEHOUSE! :D

One last paper tomorrow, & I'm done w school!
I wanna treat myself to B&J's after that!
Woohooooo! :D
The Weekends.
It can go on so much longerrrr BUT!
I need to snap back to reality after that!
In all, I had a greaaaaaaaaaat weekend!
How about you? :D

KAE

2009-05-09T01:30:00.001+08:00

Happy Birthdays!

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY TO NUR FARAHEEN YAU!
I've said whatever I need to say in my birthday msg to you & I hope you were touched and happy w the surprise birthday plan we had for you! Love love ya! :D

Sexayes are awesome as usual! It's been a long time since I've last seen them and how much have I missed in seeing them grow. I couldnt even believe how some of them were looking already. & a few of them are already heading around w their own bikes & cars. (In which, my turn to enrol will be the end of this year. Bike! Bike! Bike! :D ) So I got to release some of my misses to them for a while during Farah's surprise birthday plan. & their support and love for me in encouraging me to reach out for my dreams to do what I love doing the most is unbelievable. It's been 6 years & I still enjoy their company every time we meet. I still love each and every one of them to bits & have always do! Definitely, aint nothing like them. ((:

/edited

& HAPPY AWESOME BIRTHDAY TO QURRA LOVE!!
I am so sorry this came in late cause I didnt know it was your birthday too!
Luckily I caught myself in the nick of time! Hahaha.
Anyways, may God bless your soul and insyaAllah, everything will go smoothly in life for you.
Have a kickass year ahead and I wish you all the best in life. Enjoy love! (:

KAE

2009-05-06T22:30:00.002+08:00

& When The Weather Turns Misty

Cause we had it, we was magic.

Oh wait, we still are. (:

KAE

2009-05-03T20:51:00.005+08:00

Feel the Love

2nd May: Happy Birthday Melly Twinny! :D

Friends have been the awesome-st with their undying support, love and encouraging words. Though I do not expect anything, I feel grateful enough to cross the first obstacle & wont regret whatever happens next week. Thank you awesomes for everything (:

I cant wait for this coming week to end as by then, most of my exams would already be done. I cant wait for Tuesday either for the repertoire scene somehow! Tomorrow, a whole day of rehearsal and tech runs so I'll be home real late. I have to get started on my Laban & ED History stuffs soon too. I'm done w Modal Making and Theatre Costume and I am feeling so very glad to hand them all in tomorrow. I dont care what grades I get for those. I regretted taking up such courses. Sheesh.

I feel real guilty too nowadays. I'm really glad I got to spend most of my time w some of the classmates and the Saturday loves. But I really need to start meeting up with the Sexayes, dedicate at least my Sundays for my family again and of course, mr loverboy who has been there most of the time to hear me whine and rejoice. I need my holidays soon maaaaaaan.

Okay I'm done w watching X-Men w the family in the living room and I'm moving into my bedroom. Toodles!

KAE

2009-04-30T22:08:00.002+08:00

Unkept VS Kept

Yes, I cant hide it any longer.
Sometimes I feel like there should be a need to have a sense of pride and joy
in showing it appreciatively publicly.
Afterall, I'm still a girl w feelings.

On a lighter note,

Happy 20th Birthday Farah Yasmine the sexy bitch! (:

On another different confused note,

Saturday, 2nd May.

The day that I've been having mixed feelings about.
Am still confused and re-thinking.

KAE

2009-04-28T21:13:00.005+08:00

Fate Says

They say, fate has a way of making two people meet and has a way in making a decision of whether they are fated to just meet in life or more than that.

But, there are some things you just cant have.
You just cant go against fate.

Tuhan, maafkan diri ini
Yang tak pernah bisa menjauh dari angan tentangnya
Namun apalah daya ini
Bila ternyata sesungguhnya, aku terlalu cinta dia.

KAE

2009-04-26T20:21:00.002+08:00

Exhausting Weekend

No matter how busy we all are with our own lives now, I keep them in my heart and mind always and I'm missing them in every way possible. Loves. (:

The weekend was not bad I must say. It was a little tad boring but in the end it turned out well. I guess all that matters was being in the company of your friends to just hang around with, talk about almost everything and do what we do best: EAT. I just woke up about an hour ago cause I didnt sleep the whole night while at the chalet cause I simply cant shut my mind off for some reason. So when I got back, I slept throughout the whole afternoon yet I still feel so freakingly exhausted as though I'm really deprived of rest. I gotta get some schoolwork done and I'm off to bed again! Woohoooo. Since Nizam is working tonight, I've got more reasons to sleep early for school the next day. Speaking of which, I'm looking forward to the holidays cause we all need it so, so badly! For now, 2 weeks of exams so I gotta give all I've got now. Wish me luck! (:

Upset yet trying not to show it.

KAE

2009-04-22T00:03:00.003+08:00

Super Dee Duper, Cali Fra Gi... Blah Blah Blahhhh...

I'm craving for a date w my 2 Superhumans and another w the 2 Bestfriends. (esp to Tiq, I miss you bbyg!)

I was thinking of thinning my hair or something cause it's slowly turning into a lion's mane. But I'm kinda afraid the hairdresser might actually cut the length a little too while he/she is at it. Every inch of my hair counts right now cause I wanna have long hair this time! More than a year of having short hair is enough for now. I want to have long, flowy, wavy hair which will "fly" w the wind when the cool breeze blows. Hahahaha. My hair needs to grow faster than this cause once I lose my patience, I will cut it all off and back again to square 1. So, grow baby grow!

School has been so demanding, boring and tiring. 6 months straight of school & rehearsals is slowly taking my energy away and I get so tired, sleepy and even have headaches when I got home and all I could think of was my pretty little comfy bed, (and of course FOOD!). Speaking of which, I cant wait to save up my cash, get my butts to IKEA & transform my room! Since the walls are still white due to my fickle-minded self, I just let it be for now cause I dont want to regret it later when I pick a colour in a hasty manner. Now, I know what colour to choose, how I want my room to be and I am effing excited to get to work on it! Woohoo.

Okay, I should be asleep already by now. Lucky thing school's starting at 2pm later and so I can sleep in a little longer. Here I come sweetest of dreams! :)

KAE

2009-04-19T03:22:00.003+08:00

Counting Down

I know I'm not right all the time.
So I expect people whom I looked up to, to guide me along.
Somehow, that expectation might be too high for someone.

Less than 10 lifelines left.
I'm loosing my patience & I'm about to be driven to insanity.
Seriously.

KAE

2009-04-17T00:25:00.002+08:00

Happy Goober w A Lil Tinch of Spice!

Because of these two cheeky ones, they made me feel life is worthwhile and they made me feel grateful lately. Thanks for the support, the love, the encouragement and understanding of what I'm going through right now. For now, you girls have filled my days w laughter and smiles and I appreciate all the late night chilling sessions just to accompany me when I need people to be there. You girls know so much about what's within and yes, I admit I am very happy with tonight & I feel like it can't be better without you girls around. As a result, I'm going to bed w a huge grin plastered on my face. Thank you so much. Loves.

when you do not ask for anything, it is always given to you. do not expect too much. just live life the way you should. live it to the fullest and enjoy it like there's no tomorrow! (:

KAE

2009-04-15T22:27:00.002+08:00

Mr Fireman turns 21!

Another sweetheart turns a year older. Have a kickass 21st year and may it be full of more successes and good stuffs coming your way! God bless love! :) (That would be from me & Daeia)
A PURPLE post dedicated to you! :D

KAE.

2009-04-12T21:56:00.003+08:00

Broken

When the visions around you, bring tears to your eyes
And all that surrounds you, are secrets & lies...

KAE

2009-04-11T12:23:00.003+08:00

A Millie For My Thoughts

Half of me regretted going last night. Half of my soul wasnt there though my whole body was. I had my share of fun w Barbie & Sugar Mami. But I turned into a mini wreck after the whole thing. Even the fresh air and a whole bowl of Indo Mi didnt cheer me up. I didnt had a good night's sleep too. That was how bad I felt.

On a lighter note, I enjoyed myself w all the performances over at Azzucar. & it's better having your loud & supporting girlfriends around w you. You let down your hair & they still love you no matter how crazy you are being and even though people from everywhere were looking at how boisterous we were but we dont give a shit. That's why I tend to stick around longer.

Your Princess here has a heavy mind & an even heavier heart ever since...

Laterr.

2009-04-05T23:34:00.004+08:00

Umpteen Times

You did it again tonight.
Congratulations.

Laterr.

2009-04-04T00:28:00.002+08:00

Fer-rai-dey.

Where are all my Sexayes at? I've been so busy w my other stuffs & other group of friends, I dont know what's going on w Sexayes anymore. Whenever there's a meet up, I'm always already booked for other plans, & when I'm free & initiate a meet up, they are all busy at the same time. This is so sad. I feel so faraway from all of them. I dont know the latest news, or the latest happenings. I feel neglected cause I've neglected them in a way. Oh wells. I hope I can make it for the next meet up. I really dont want to lose contact w those friends that I've grew up w since young.

Anyway, watched the Year 3 Graduation Show #1. It was not bad. But I got a bit bored during parts when there were too much talking. I enjoyed the dancing parts though! They were all looking awesome in their black sexy lingerie-like costume. Thumbs up for the show! (:

Tomorrow, I gotta get up damn early for dance practice over at town. & then, head off to Zizi's (Malay Drama Lecturer) wedding at City Hall. Congrats to her for tying the knot already on Thursday! After that, we shall do what we all do best. LEPAAAAAAAAAK! :P Another day w the 2 cheeky asses & Sexaye boy. Woohoooooo.

Laterr!

2009-04-02T22:52:00.003+08:00

My Everything Part 2

But, He hasnt answered my prayers, my pleas & my cries for one thing. Cause no matter how much I deny w whoever and whatever, I still cant hide the fact that I....

2009-04-02T21:12:00.002+08:00

My Everything.

I cant express how grateful I felt before I could finally close my eyes & have that well-deserved rest in the wee hours of this morning.
Only He knows what I went through & what I was feeling that I couldnt really expressed out.
That's why He is the first & the last one whom I'll run to, to seek consolation.
He heard my prayers. He heard my pleas. He heard my cries.
& true to His words, He answered them all
Syukur Alhamdulillah.
(:

Laterr.

2009-03-31T01:21:00.000+08:00

But...

Plasters a big silly grin on your face, fills your stomach w butterflies, makes you blush for no apparent rhyme or reason, chases your blues away, soothe your nerves w just a smile, leaves you breathless w every step taken, steals away your heartbeat to match his and never fail to make you feel so special in a way you never thought you could be.

How sweet and deep...

It dont mean nothing if it aint coming from the one you love as much.

2009-03-29T22:45:00.004+08:00

Peek-tures!

*Credits to Cel for the performance pictures.

Sometimes love comes around, & it knocks you down.

Laterr.

2009-03-29T00:50:00.003+08:00

Broken

Popcorn Playa: Ladies' Edition went real well, I should say. I was happy w everything and a good surprise was planned out nicely. I had a blast w them cheeky ones after so long of not meeting after that. Special thanks to Fortu, Hel & Firwan for carrying the songs w me and Daeia the homie for the hair, make-up & support. I wanted to go around saying my hello(s) and all after the show but I stayed inside to help clean up and I totally forgot all about it. Silly me and that made me feel so ignorant of the people around me as though it was on purpose. I cant help it sometimes cause when I'm focused on other things, I can forget about who & what is around my surroundings. I'm so sorry to those affected. Oh well, still, all's good today and I definitely wanna do this again. (:

It wasnt easy w you around but still I managed.

Laterr.

2009-03-25T22:24:00.003+08:00

Runaway Love

Things are going well, I assure you all. Family's good, school & classmates have been awesome especially the three cheeky girls I've been ranting my nonsense to, us is well & my other lovelys I've been missing too are all fine. But really, I'm still a girl. I feel whatever every girl would feel. & running away from it all is one thing. I want to run away. Run away in whatever directions that are available for me possible.

Sometimes, what a girl needs is just her own time by herself.

Laterr.

2009-03-24T20:48:00.002+08:00

Popcorn Playa 4.

Popping Corns Them Ladies' Style.
28th March, Saturday. Be there!

Laterr.

2009-03-21T12:50:00.002+08:00

Short & Sweet

Dinner w the Sayangs may be short but it was something we've been looking forward to. Somehow, we have this curse of always cancelling on each other till the very last minute. But, we made it last night! (: So many stories (& of course, the latest gossips) were shared and we storytell till there's no tomorrow. Then we left, with smiles, hugs & kisses leaving a promising impression of more meet-ups soon!

There really isnt anything much for me to blog about these days. It's either been school, school, school and more school. It's like I'm going to school 2 semesters straight cause holidays were taken up by rehearsals & make up lessons. Sheesh. Anyway, my acting group have gotten our new scripts. We're doing Shakespeare's work this time! Hamlet & A Midsummer Night's Dream. 6 weeks to showtime and we have a loooooooot of work to do for this. Gosh, I've been missing a lot of awesomes lately. Been busy w school, I dont know whats going on really on the other sides. Let's hope for more meet-ups soon. It's time I update myself w stuffs!

Family gathering w everybody on the paternal's side tonight. Cant wait!

Laterr!

2009-03-16T21:59:00.002+08:00

Love, Sex, Magic.

I'm hooked to this shit right here thanks to KHRL. & I especially love the chorus. :P

(Chorus)

All night, show it, just you and the crowd
Doing tricks you never seen
And I bet that I can make you believe
In love and SEXAYE MAGIC
So let me drive my body around you
I bet you know what I mean
Cause you know that I can make you believe
In love and SEXAYE MAGIC

Back to school tomorrow. Laterr!

2009-03-15T17:22:00.007+08:00

Sleepover's the Shit!

Hello awesomes! Yes, I've noticed I havent been updating for a few days. Nope, I wasnt on hiatus or whatsoever. Just hasnt been home for 2 nights. Been busy w rehearsals and finally, the repertoire scene has ended for the term! All went well and I believe, everyone thinks that this is their best work yet. I'm glad people liked my South American accent. Not bad for a first attempt! Tennesse William's Streetcar Named Desire & The Glass Menagarie was a success. (:

So like I said, I havent been home for 2 nights. Been bunking in at Fortu's place w Daeia and Rosy. Since we are all too lazy to get back and forth to school from our own homes, we slept over at Fortu's hostel which is just behind school. In any case, we were still late for rehearsals and for our call time. What can I say? Bad habits die hard! I had so much fun w the girls and had experienced a first time. It wasnt as bad as it sounds, neither it's something I'll do always but yeah, 2 nights straight was enough for me for now. Like they said, all good things must come to an end. I doubt that. I'm just starting to have fun on my last teenage year. Best believe that. ;)

Snapshots taken before the show:

The 2nd Stella & Blanche DuBois.

The 1st Stella and 2nd Blanche.
The 2 Blanche DuBois.
Blanche(s) & Eunice Hubble.
I love this!

With Laura from The Glass Menagarie.
Sexaye Magic going Old Hollywood ish.

I have no comments on this homie! :P

The USA All Stars were awesome!

Thanks for everything girls! Next up, the NEXT repertoire scene! :P

I'm finally done with my presentation for Malay Drama. & now, I'm craving badly for bubble tea!

Laterr!

2009-03-11T10:48:00.003+08:00

What Gives?

My feelings for everything is screwed up in a way. I'm being very inconsistent about the way I do or feel about things or people. Sometimes I'm high, sometimes I'm low. At times I love and at other times, I despise. The sad thing is, it's happening too frequently, at times, in a matter or seconds or minutes. I dont know what is wrong w me and why the heck I'm going through all this. But for whatever reason there is, to whom I might offend or get offended with, I'd like to apologise in advanced if it's really nothing so much of a big deal to blow my top over. Except for you. Bear with me for now cause I'm not being anything. I'm just highly emotional these days.

In other words, I'm a total wreck on the inside.

Off for a whole day of rehearsal till night. Laterr.

2009-03-10T23:59:00.004+08:00

SBB!

Hel made me smile the whole time I was talking to him and he kept that silly grin plastered on my face about SBB! Hehehe. *inserts cheeky grin* Ey Helbby, b_ _ _ _ is so near yet so far eh! :P

/edited:

& now, my two favourite boys, Hel & Nizam are making me a happy goober w all their crazy antics. Cinta Atiqah, Edward "Tak Penting" Cullen is not needed eh! :P

Laterr!

2009-03-09T21:07:00.003+08:00

~~Special~~ Friendship.

It may seem as unimportant to you, but it means a lot to me. Dont worry. I've cleared whatever there is to clear in my FB and F/S accounts. & I'll try very hard to not even mention anything in this blog of mine after this. In other words, you do not exist as such in my life. I'm good without all these. Really.

& nobody plans on how to greet another the day before.

Now, I shall resume chatting w my bbyg whom I've not catch up w in a while. Tiq, bear w my complaints, whines & whatnots. I appreciate you being there love. (:

Laterr.

2009-03-08T20:53:00.004+08:00

Feeling This

Cleaning my room clears a load of my mind. I concentrated so hard on getting my room clean that I didnt have time to think much about stuffs.
& now that's done, I think I deserve a whole bowl of B&J's Chunky Monkey all to myself.
Anyone?

Laterr.

2009-03-08T02:10:00.003+08:00

On the Low?

I had an awesome Saturday. I got to meet Sexayes darlings and the usual Saturday gang. A very awesome job to my two girls, Shar & Midah during Danceworks 2009. (:

& I've nothing to add to what's after that when I got home and switched on my lappy. Cause being utterly disappointed with something is not worth mentioning. Staying at home Sunday to tidy my overloaded wardrobe, clean my room and change to cleaner bedsheets in the afternoon and to get some school work done in the late evening. I've got stuffs to do to get me occupied the whole day. I cant freaking wait.

Laterr.

2009-03-06T00:49:00.016+08:00

Overloaded!

Okay. Warning: This post is overloaded with plenty of pictures. Taken during our 6 days work over at Victoria Theatre for the Importance of Being Ernest for the Buds Theatre Co. Enjoy!! :D

We decided to kill Rosie's camera with our faces! :P These are taken before show when we've got time to kill before work starts for us.

After camwhoring fun time, we went back to start on what we were supposed to be doing in the first place! Hahaha. Queens of Hair & Make-up hard at work!

& then so, we had loads of time to kill too while the show was going on. We only had to touch them up during their interval breaks. & yes, we got back to camwhoring! :D

And then, after show, we've got very happy actors and very happy helpers! :D

With Julie Wee & Susan Turdoff.

Meet Jennifer Stacey, the gorgeous girl I got to work on!

& also Nikki Wise, another one I worked on.

Michael Corbidgeeeeeee!

Okay, before Hel starts reminding me over & over again, I better head to bed now! (:

Laterr!

2009-03-03T22:42:00.002+08:00

Get Real.

I wouldnt say it if I'm not bothered/irritated by this. Unfortunately I am. Seriously, some "extra special" individuals are so full of themselves, thinking they are way up there above the rest of us. I would love to stick their own ego bullshit up each and every one of them asses.

Laterr.

2009-03-01T21:43:00.006+08:00

Inspiration Gone.

I think I've lost a little inspiration to blog. Either I've nothing much to say or I will keep repeating the same progress with life, cause really, everything is going on well so far. Or rather, I'm simply too lazy, to put it plainly. Another Saturday chilling out. Though it was for a short while, I appreciate the presence of those who came down. I had my share of fun. Each and everyone of my Superhumans were there! Nizam took the time to come down too which I really appreciate the thoughtful decision of his. (: The next time, it shall be a longer session with everyone present. Hmms... Tutorial break will start as of tomorrow. But with rehearsals and make up classes, what part of break does all that fall into? 2 weeks more to the repertoire scene. I'll be even busier after that. Gee.

All of the above has the ability to entertain my nonsense, deal w my whines & complaints and cause me to fall into my laughing fit mode! (:

~~i miss what was before of 23.~~

Laterr!

2009-02-26T23:01:00.004+08:00

Take This In:

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY CRANKY!
So, stay away to those who have nothing better to say. Thank you! (:

Laterr.

2009-02-24T22:26:00.003+08:00

Guess Who's Back?

The Queens of Hair & Make-Up, Backstage of Victoria Theatre. (w Rebecca, our Assistant Stage Manager. Lol.)

So after MIA-ing for a few days. I am back! So many events occurred during the last past few days and I had a really good experience working with the same crew and actors, at the same theatre and time, doing the same make-up work for 6 days straight. I felt the bond and I am glad that I had decided to lend a helping hand in making a production a success. Lucky us, we got to watch the rehearsals and learn at the same time so Claire didnt pick us from the "streets" and there is her motive there. I did learn a lot from an actor's behaviour, attitude and demands to his/her needs. After we're done w the actors' hair & make-up, the Queens of Hair and Make-up sneaked into the theatre on the second last night to watch the last act of the play since we missed that part for the last 4 days. It was an awesome production put up and I am proud to be part of that family who made it possible. "Importance of Being Ernest" by the Buds Theatre Co. was a success and I hope to work and be a part of more productions under it in the future! Claire Devine, Sahirrah, Rebecca Lee, Rosemary McGowan along w the crew and actors have been such great people to work w throughout the production. Many, many thanks to them! :) Oh and pictures taken will be up soon when I've gotten ALL of them from Rosie.

School have been okay for me. My scene for the repertoire show is coming into shape and I had quite an intensed session last Friday. We've finally finish going through that scene. I just need to practice a little on my Southern American accent as advised by Andrew since somehow, during that particular session, I accidentally and unconsciously fall into the accent. I dont know how I did it, but I did it and now I've got to shape it all up! Damnnnnn. Oh! For those who will be free, please come down to NAFA Campus 3 Studio Theatre on the 13th & 14th March at 8pm for my class' repertoire scene. It's FOC! :D

& I want my usual chilling session w the usual Saturday gang. Much misses! :(

Laterr!

2009-02-19T10:28:00.002+08:00

Mask-ed.

And everyone thought I was doing good. I am.
Just not these days. Just not now.
I'm done here.

Laterr.

2009-02-16T21:43:00.003+08:00

Date-lines.

To those I've planned dates w, please be patient as I am going to be very busy starting this week. I might go on a hiatus for a while. With the extra production work, semester show and more and more and more, more, more assignments piling up! I'm going to be even busier after the term break though. Anyways, for now, I'll inform you guys of my term break (most probably in March), which hopefully, I can still make time for the dates during that limited period of time. Dont think I will forget okay. So, no excuses and no escape for you people! :P

& I'll definitely make time for this cause you so owe me one!

me? eating disorder, or is it?

Laterr!

2009-02-15T01:16:00.003+08:00

To Cool Off & Time Off.

Clarke Quay later on. To get assignments done. I cant wait. (:

rocking plain white tees;
Atika

2009-02-12T21:41:00.002+08:00

To my most loudest, noisiest, cheekiest and smartest sister, HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY!!

You will get your present soon okay! & be ready for your new course in a new school!
God Bless.

I still have to make dates with people who owe me dates. Superhumans, you people owe meeeee! & Tiq, you know, i know ey bbyg! :P Next weekend, I'm going to work under one of my lecturers in school in one of her productions. I think it's going to be a great experience to be able to work with a production other than school's. I'll be doing the make-up. So, hopefully, all goes well! I felt that this term is going real fast. Somehow, it's nearing the 2 weeks tutorial break already. I guess this is the feeling when I'm enjoying almost every class and is attending classes regularly! :P I'm trying to kick my bad habit and I'm progressing. Well done girl! *pats back*

Okay now, I cant wait for the weekend cause I need some TLC. I deserve it okay! Hahaha. So people like Nizam, Adel, Hel, Khai and the rest that I've talked to, better brace yourselves for me this weekend! I want to get sinful treats this weekend and I better get what I want! Hahaha. Hmm... so where can I get the best, most chocolatey brownie in Sg?

rocking plain white tee;
Atika

2009-02-11T16:22:00.003+08:00

Wright.

I thought I was struggling. But damn right, I was wrong.
.
.
.
.
Instead, you cant keep up w me. True that.

rocking plain white tees;
Atika.

2009-02-10T09:13:00.006+08:00

19 is the new 18 biaaaaatch!

Yo girl finally turned 19 todaaaaaaay!
*BIG HINT BIG HINT!* :P
I shall have fun today and the whole of this week! Like my bbyg Tiq said, "Today no Msexayemagic but Princessmagic on your bday! :D"
Off to school and I shall come back w more updates! Oh! And Happy birthday to Quraisha & Azie darlings too! :D

/edited:
I shall blog about the blasts I have after the weekends.
Till then! :D

rocking plain white tees;
Atika.

2009-02-08T22:22:00.004+08:00

Shopped Till I Dropped!

Yes, I shopped till I dropped today. Even had early dinner over at Fish & Co. All thanks to Mama & Ayah for the birthday treat! I simply love family outings. Especially w just the 5 of us.
Blissful. (:

Tags reply:

Ayu: I LOVE KAE AND I MISS KAEEE
KAE: I LOVE AYU AND I MISS AYUUU TOO!

ShaRz: HAHAHAHAHAHA ! OIII ! BURUK SIAAAAA MUKER AKU ! HAHAHA ! tkper lah. because your birthday is coming , ill allow you to put it dere ah. glad you enjoyed teh mini surprise ! LOVE YOU KAE ! :D
KAE: HAHAHAHA! I think you're used to all the not important faces of yours up here in my blog. Hahaha. and yes, I truly enjoyed every minute of the mini surprise! Thanks so much love! LOVE YOU TOO SHAR! :D

♥Chippy.: you're relinked, love! and, I MISS YOU SO MUCHHHHHHH!
KAE: Thanks loveeee! and, I MISS YOU TOOOOO! Hehe.

★Nurul: waaa countdwn 19 seyhhh... weeee. kae da tue! hahahaha
KAE: Weiiiii. Not old eh. I'm turning 18 again. I'm forever 18!! Hahaha.

Quee(: HAHAS! muker shar sungguh tak perlu ehk! heh. anw, i look darn fat in all the pictures lar. but yeahh, i love you too darls. (:
KAE: Hahaha. Shar what! Never change from last time. I think you looked absolutely gorgeous cause I only have gorgeous girlfriends and that's that. & be strong love! We are all behind you! :)

rocking plain white tees;
Atika.

2009-02-08T12:53:00.004+08:00

To An Unexpected Soul

I am so very confused.
So confused till I dont know how I should feel anymore.
I dont know what feelings should I contain and of which I should let go.
Help.

rocking plain white tees;
Atika

2009-02-07T23:52:00.005+08:00

Beautiful Saturday

Like she said, we share almost everything similar!

January/Capricorn babies.

The 3 younger ones. :P

Miss Spore Poly 2007!

The cheeky and sneaky ones who surprised us!

The birthday muffins. Yummy!

The two 19 year olds and about to be 19 year old. Haha!

3 very elated girls! (:
I am happy to say that today was one of the most awesome-st Saturdays ever! I finally met up w my beautiful girls. I'm so glad I initiate the date and that all of us were present even though Que & Shar were sick. It's been a long time since I've last met them. After lunch, we got ourselves chewy cookies from Subway and went off to Coffee Bean to chill. As usual, every time we meet, the date is bound to be full of never-ending story-telling, juicy gossips and endless whines and complaints. We didn't have to do much but to just pick a place and start to catch up with each other's lives. The most touching part was when the 3 cheeky younger ones surprised the rest of us. They bought muffins as birthday cakes. At first, we all thought there was only 1 for me. But little did we know, there were 2 more for Que and Syirin! And when they sang the birthday song, the whole of Coffee Bean was singing along w us. How sweet! I couldnt describe the feeling I had at that point of time but it was the greatest feeling ever. The ambience was serene, atmosphere was cosy, company was beautiful and the time spent was definitely worthwhile. I dare say I have the most beautiful and awesome girlfriends. And nothing beats having girlfriends. True that. (:

I love you 5 gorgeous very much. More dates coming soon, insyaAllah! (:

My Saturday was beautiful and irreplacable. How about yours?

rocking plain white tees;
Atika.

2009-02-06T18:23:00.003+08:00

Undeniable.

Distance. Always.

rocking plain white tees;
Atika

2009-02-04T22:19:00.004+08:00

Wet-nesday.

It actually rained again today. Hmmms. Moving on... I hate it when I have school assignments to worry to get them done. Since class was cancelled today, I went to meet Mel and Rosie to get our stuffs for Stage Modal Making and Theatre Costume. We took quite a while to get our materials and I had such a headache in getting them. I wonder how those real Art students find their materials without much of a problem. Friday, I'm going to get the stuff so I can start working on the floor base plan during the 5 hours break that I have. After school, I shall start working on the assignment for T.C, to which I've asked Nizam to print some pictures for me. Just have to collect them on Saturday, insyaAllah, so I can finish them all up by Sunday.

On my way back, I saw the upgrading of the new mosque in Sengkang. It's looking real good and I cant wait for it to finish. Hopefully, I'm able to sign up for courses there. It's time I do since I've not done so a few years back and since Dad's been nagging on me to. Anyways, counting down, 6 more days. I've already got 3 dates set for this w my favourite people and I cant wait! Hopefully, I'm able to spend a day w Sexayes, my Superhumans and the usual Saturday people, insyaAllah.
I wish I could stay up but I have school the next day. Bummer.

Till here. Laterr!

rocking plain white tees;
Atika

2009-02-03T20:34:00.007+08:00

A Little Update.

Some pictures taken on Saturday after Orrang.
Had some good laughs along the way.
I was looking forward more to seeing the usual awesomes though for the day.
And for some reason, surprisingly, almost everybody was wearing black. Lol.

School has been going on okay lately.
Assignments piling up, to be done by this weekend.
For Stage Modal Making and Theatre Costume modules, it feels like sec school days again doing Art and stuffs.
Other than that, there's nothing much to update.

& counting down, 7 more days to me, turning 19. ):
No wait. I'm forever 18! LOOOOOL.
So, who wants to take me shopping as a treat! :P

rocking plain white tees;
Atika

2009-01-31T12:46:00.002+08:00

Promo Ish.

2009-01-30T23:49:00.004+08:00

Denially Desires.

How can you dream about something positive, something you desire so much though not necessarily want, yet at the same time, when you woke up, sat at the side of your bed, taking your time to start reminiscing everything in that dream, instead of finding yourself staring into space w a big silly grin plastered on your face & being contented enough w having that dream , you found yourself in tears to which you didnt realise till you felt your heart ache, literally?
.
.
.
So after that, I got up to wash my face.
I still have about 2 hours before I'm supposed to be up for school.
But I dared not continue my sleep, afraid that dream might come back.
I was not ready for it at all and I never will.
So I stayed up all the way till I was due to get ready.
I thought about it again as I was showering and getting ready in my room.
Never once did it stop haunting my mind.
It only stopped when I was in school.
And when I'm home and night falls, it starts to come back.
To which how it leads to this post.
& after all that, I asked myself the qns in the beginning & I can only come to 3 conclusions.

1. Because it's something I care about so much but can't be fulfilled.
2. Because some dreams are not meant to come true.
& lastly,
3. Because I am only human

.......

2009-01-30T21:51:00.004+08:00

Sassy With a Touch of Sexaye-ness.

This song, of which is Adel Syg's current favourite, has gotten me hook to it too.I find the song really catchy and I'm caught laughing to myself while trying to do some of the hand gestures and steps! Hahaha. Really sexaye ladies with their dance moves and never was baring too much. It takes quite some time for the song to start. So for those impatient brats, please just skip to after 2 minutes. :P It's in Korean and there are the subtitles below.
Okay, now go enjoy! :D

I want nobody, nobody but youuuuuu. (:

2009-01-28T22:33:00.010+08:00

Change-ling-a-ling-a-ling!

I've bid goodbye to my blonde streaks!
Dyed very deep red.
Just the way my parents like seeing me! :D

/edited

Current time check: 1.58 am.

I am supposed to be sound asleep right now. I was halfway there to dreamland a while ago. But I suddenly felt so restless. My room is freaking hot and I have no idea why. So what I did was changed into a much comfortable top, switched on my lappy, turned off the fan,
and then, after months & months of not using it, my dusty air-con is finally switched on!
I dont like to use the air-con while sleeping. It's bad for my throat and for some reason,
I started to get sinus problem since last year. And now since the air-con is working, I can feel my sinus problem creeping back. This sucks but I have got no choice. And now I shall wait till I feel sleepy enough to roll back into bed.

Counting down... 10...9...8... Now where did all the sheeps run to...

2009-01-26T22:32:00.001+08:00

SEXAYES LOVE & MISSES.

I miss all of them much. Been quite a while since we all last met. A gathering soon please.

2009-01-25T14:53:00.005+08:00

True Denial.

I'm currently having such a great time talking to one of my dear sweethearts when suddenly she mentioned something undeniably true at times and weird. Here's what she's got to say:

(tu) says:
yknow, i really dont understand boys
(tu) says:
when part drg chase kiter, they everyday contact, bangun jek msg
(tu) says:
but in the later part, they slowly dont do those stuffs anymore
(tu) says:
PELIK. -_-
(tu) says:
then they will wonder why girls turn les when they are the primary cause of it -_-

& to all my ladies who feel this, hang in there sweethearts.
Karma has its way of showing its presence.

On a lighter note,

I MISS MY SUPER DUPER HUMANS BADLY. ):

2009-01-23T23:46:00.004+08:00

A Blessing.

Seven.
Alhamdulillah. (:

I laughed myself silly today!
Both in school and during dinner meet-up.
Thanks to Kunjung & B in school and thanks to my 2 darlings, Adel & Sherrynaah & especially OneDee during dinner.
I think, my stomach insides are all shattered into pieces due to excessive laughter.
I feel like a happy kid again! :D
& I dont want to ever grow up.
Take me to Never Never Land then.

Then tomorrow or soon, I shall blog about "nose".
:P

2009-01-21T22:52:00.004+08:00

Improper Update.

For some reason, that particular hairstyle melted my insides.
It wasnt stylish, it wasnt out of this world, it wasnt supermodel cut.
But it's just nice for me to enjoy seeing it everyday on someone. (:

School's been great.
Superhumans' been awesome.
Days now have been going real well so far.
& to end it, brace yourself for the next few days/weeks.
Cause something big is about to hit MSexayemagic very soon.
Yes folks, I cant help but go through this. The PMS nightmare!

I cant figure out what proper update I should give.
So, I shall stick to random posts for now.
My body clock's adjusted and I'm off to bed quite earlier than usual these days.
Another long, physical day in school tomorrow.
I have something I'm not looking forward to.
& it's not the first 2 lessons. -_-

Laterr!